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Friday, May 27, 2011

Cyclic Drama, Composition, and AROTR

Sometimes I really wonder how the hell I get myself into certain situations with what I like to call 'cyclic drama'. This of course meaning the kind of drama in which you feel like you are caught into a circle of he said/she said bullshit in which you feel like you are constantly stepping on egg shells to avoid hurting ones feelings. Life would be so much easier if I was just a pure asshole who actually had the heart to always tell people what I really feel about them. Then perhaps people wouldn't come to me with advice or to lay a secret on me about someone else which will eventually get pried from my soul by the person in question.

In a way, I am reminded of the character 'Chloe Sullivan' from the TV Drama 'Smallville'. Despite that she is a fictional character, the idea of a good loyal friend who has unwillingly taken the role of a web for catching lies and secrets is very alive in society. And currently, I feel as though I am caught in that position. I tell people not to ask me to keep a secret - not because I can't keep it, but because I don't want to have to lie when the times comes when my back is up against the wall. And believe me, as far as secrets are concerned that time ALWAYS arrives and with the vicious fires of hell. Choosing which friend you are going to betray is not something ANYONE should have to ever go through.

In other news, I am happy to say that I have finished my concert band work and it has been submitted to the directors of the IUS Concert Band. I don't really have any doubts that the band will perform the piece, however the self-criticism usually starts to set in around this time. I often face personal regret when completing a piece of music and publishing it or sharing it with others. Usually this involves questioning my own innovation and considering things I probably should have done (e.g. should I have given the trumpets more, did I modulate enough to keep it interesting, does the title fit the nature of the piece, etc.) To think of all of the music I've written in the past that had great potential but was ruined because I don't take my time when completing anything. And many of my music I've even deleted halfway through. I call this the 'Paul Dukas' syndrome. Dukas was notorious for destroying his own works because of his dissatisfaction and pure hatred for his music. Luckily, 'The Sorcerer's Apprentice' never made it to the fireplace. Still, I can never listen to that piece without picture a personified mouse waving his arms around a bunch of dancing brooms. Just one of the many ways Disney has ruined my life.

Well, anyway...if you are interested you may check out the score and listen to a 'rough' mp3 at the following website. I've priced the score high and have not included parts out of respect for the IUS Concert Band who should hopefully be debuting the piece in the fall.

Ever hear of Steve Sizemore Group? They are a local band out of Lexington, Ky and are playing at the Abbey Road on the River festival in downtown Louisville this weekend. My brother, Paul, is playing with the group and will be there as well. Make sure you check them out if you get a chance!

I really wish I could go down there all weekend, but unfortunately I will be working most of the weekend. Well, that and its about $30 a day. Who really has that kind of money? Apparently crazy Beatles fans do. Don't get me wrong, I like the Beatles but would choose to listen to the Who over them any day. I do have a lot of respect for them and for what they did for the rock and roll industry, however. Just not sure if its worth $30 to spend the day seeing a bunch of bands butcher their songs (except for SSG...cause they are fawking awesome). Anyway, if you love the Beatles you will probably enjoy it. If you LOVE the Beatles, you will probably hate it.

Well, that about does it for today's blog. While I don't have the passion to update this on a daily basis like my brother does in his World Famous Mokracy Blog, I try to keep it updated at least once a week.

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